January 13th, 2012

Inspired by Newt Gingrich’s and Rick Perry’s attacks on and Mitt Romney’s defense of vulture capitalism.


“We’re painted as monsters…
And do you know what the people say?
Plucked from the garden of wretched beliefs
I offer a rose and smile with harmless teeth
Then slick back my hair.
You know the Devil’s in there alone in the garden.
Like lumbering giants in a shameful parade,
We came to ruin all and make a rotten trade.”
Them Crooked Vultures


Vultures are part of nature, which even kids get,

But most people wouldn’t want one as a pet.


Most people don’t find vultures particularly appealing

And watching them work can give one a sickened feeling.


No one relishes the idea of seeing vultures circle overhead,

Which strongly suggests the circle-ee will shortly be dead.


(At least vultures don’t start dismembering you before you decease,

Which vulture capitalists happily do their rate of return to increase.)


Romney and friends find raising the Bain issue deplorable

And want to convince us that vultures are simply adorable.


And just in case you hadn’t heard,

Mitt wants the vulture to be our new national bird.


Here are Mitt and some of his vulture capitalist friends at work.

Here’s your theme music, Them Crooked Vultures performing Elephants, from their CD of the same name (drummer Dave Grohl is a local boy).


Here’s Hardball’s 1/12/11 panel discussion about vulture capitalism.

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Here’s Perry’s comment, helpfully reproduced on Newt Gingrich’s Youtube page.

Here’s Rudy Guliani on Fox News coming to vulture capitalism’s defense.

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