The (Tan) Line Must Be Drawn Here

July 2nd, 2010

Inspired by the anti-tanning tax rally yesterday in Nebraska.

“I’m proud to tell you that Nebraska is one of 20 states challenging this law. It is a massive bill that is incredibly complex, but one thing is very clear: this bill increases taxes, and we’re opposed to that. As you know better than most, starting today, the federal government has imposed a 10% excise tax on tanning. It is one of several new taxes included in the healthcare package.” –Gov. Dave Heineman (R-NE) at the Repeal the Tan Tax Rally yesterday in Lincoln, Nebraska
“I am here to tell you right now, today, the line must be drawn right here.” – International SmartTan’s Joe Levy at the rally
“I now know the pain of racism, and I’m curious if you do too… Racism has been dropped at my front door, and the front door of all lighter-skinned Americans. The health care bill the president just singed into law includes a 10 percent tax on all indoor tanning sessions starting July 1st, and I say, who uses tanning? Is it dark-skinned people? I don’t think so.” –radio host Doc Thompson subbing for Fox News host Glenn Beck on his radio show 

The tanning tax went into effect yesterday.

Reverse racism, the right-wingers say!

It discriminates against whites (the only ones who tan),

Which must all along have been Obama’s secret plan.

I think Stephen Colbert hit the nail right on the head:

The tax discriminates against Tangelo-Americans instead.

Like Tangelo-American Prince John Boehner of Orange,

Who is upset that the tax will on his tanning impinge.

It’s just one of many things Repubs don’t like about the healthcare bill,

Which they’ve been trying since day one to cripple or kill.

If you want to make a big political issue out of this, fine,

But I thought the purpose of indoor tanning was to avoid a line.


Here are some scenes from the Repeal the Tan Tax Rally in Nebraska yesterday. Gov. Heineman and Levy speak at the 2”10 and 4”18 mark respectively.

Here’s Stephen Colbert’s 7/01/10 report on the unfair attacks on Tangelo-American John Boehner. (Very clever, Mr. Colbert, but I thought of the Tangelo quip first.)

The Colbert Report Mon – Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Tangelo-American John Boehner
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor Fox News

Here’s radio host Doc Thompson subbing for Fox News host Glenn Beck on his radio show 3/30/10 (funny how he sounds just like Glenn).

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One Response to “The (Tan) Line Must Be Drawn Here”

  1. Newsericks » Blog Archive » What to Expect When You’re Reforming (or: 111 Poems to Celebrate the Healthcare Reform Law’s First Anniversary) Says:

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