Posts Tagged ‘Pat Robertson’

Can You Hear Me Now, Pat?

Saturday, November 24th, 2012

Inspired by Pat Robertson: God Told Me Who The Next President Will Be (Huffington Post 1/03/12 15:44) and Breaking: God’s voice that Pat Robertson hears in his head might just be his own (Daily Kos 11/24/12 09:46).



Can you hear me now, Pat?

It’s God.

I hate to tell you,

But your hearing’s flawed.


That wasn’t me

Talking to you before,

And if you keep saying it was

I won’t talk to you anymore.


I don’t think

My speech is slurred,

So the only explanation is:

You misheard.


When it comes to presence and potency,

I am the Omni,

So don’t blame Me

For your picking Romney.


I know you believe

In constant divine intervention,

In which case you should now declare

That electing Obama was God’s intention.


The truth is,

I too believe in separation of church and state.

I let you guys make your own decisions,

Even when it doesn’t turn out great.


But I do draw the line

At all this hatred and spite,

Especially from some of My own followers

In the Religious Right.


I know, I’m forgiving,

But all the same,

I’m starting to get fed up with

The things said in My name.


So sorry, Pat,

But I think you’re out of touch.

You didn’t hear me,

Because you were talking to much.


Here’s Pat Robertson’s prediction that Mitt Romney would be elected. (NB: The videos in the Huffington Post article are from another time Pat discussed his discussion with God. He was playing coy about exactly who God said would win, but it was still pretty clear.)

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