Render Unto Caesar

November 12th, 2009

As reported in “Catholic Church Gives DC Ultimatum” (Washington Post 11/12/09), the Catholic Archdiocese of Washington announced yesterday that it will shut down it’s social service programs in DC if the DC Council passes the same-sex marriage law as is. Read our earlier piece on the Archdiocese’s opposition to DC marriage equality if you haven’t already.


The Catholic Church operates where dictators torture opponents

And wantonly murder democracy’s proponents.

But you don’t want to operate in DC

If we don’t give you a license for bigotry?


What you want is an exemption from laws already in existence.

Perhaps that explains your opposition’s persistence.

Noone is saying you have to turn secular.

Forgive me, but your reasoning is circular.


Does your opposition to gay marriage your charity outstrip?

You use 68,000 people as a bargaining chip.

You say DC your stated $10 million in co-funding doesn’t deserve

As if the Church didn’t have an obligation to serve.


Other states have similar laws

And you operate in them without complaint’s cause.

Me, I just can’t see

Why you’re so opposed to gays in DC.


Why don’t you shut down in states that recognize divorce

(Which is every state in the country, of course)?

If divorce is such a mortal sin,

Why isn’t that a law you interfere in?


Even if you close down all your charitable activities

You still can’t discriminate against those with same-sex proclivities.

The law doesn’t make you participate in gay marriage celebrations,

It just requires you to follow DC’s employment regulations.


God forbid it wouldn’t be OK

For you to discriminate against someone who’s gay.

And by the way,

Why don’t you ask God next time you pray.

You might be surprised at what she/he will say.


The thing I think God would forbid

Is what the Archdiocese of Washington did,

Threatening to withdrawal help from the needy because you’re pissed

That DC won’t let you be prejudiced.


Are you going to quit and go home with your toys

If DC lets girls marry girls and boys marry boys?

Ask yourself, what would Jesus do?

I’m sure he wouldn’t act like you.


When the Pharisees asked Jesus if Jews should follow Roman tax laws

(To trick him into offending supporters of the Palestinian cause),

Jesus said render to Caesar that which is his

(The Pharisees were disappointed he’d passed their pop quiz).


Just imagine if Jesus came into a town

And told the sick and the crippled gathered around:

“Sorry, I can’t heal you, I hope you understand.

The Romans haven’t agreed to my political demand.”


So go ahead and pray, Archbishop Wuerl,

Why don’t you just

Give it a whirl.

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Posted in Freedoms, Religion | 5 Comments »

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5 Responses to “Render Unto Caesar”

  1. Newsericks » Blog Archive » Gay Pets Says:

    […] Colbert’s excellent parody of it here). The Catholic Archdiocese of Washington is vehemently opposing DC’s marriage equality law. One of the reasons they give is that they don’t want to be forced to place adopted children with […]

  2. Newsericks » Blog Archive » Suffer Little Children Says:

    […] you, I hope you understand. The Romans haven’t agreed to my political demand.”    — “Render Unto Caesar” […]

  3. Turkish Boy Says:

    OMG I just love this guy!…

    I’m sure you’ll love him too ;-)…

  4. Newsericks » Blog Archive » Charity Begins at Home Says:

    […] Church, The Threat to Marriage, Dear Archbishop Wuerl, DC Archbishop Opposition to Gay Marriage, Render Unto Caesar, Gay Pets, Suffer Little Children, The Blood of Christ (Not) Shed for You, and Sour […]

  5. Newsericks » Blog Archive » Dear Archbishop Wuerl Says:

    […]      Archbishop Wuerl, please don’t go through with your threat […]

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