October 25th, 2009
Inspired by “Czar trouble” (Washington Post 10/23/09) and “Obama’s Many Policy Czars Draw Ire from Conservatives” (Washington Post 9/16/09).
Republicans are czar crazy,
But on the facts… hazy.
That czars are running the Nation
They won’t testify before Congress
And aren’t subject to Senate confirmation.
In fact, of Obama’s 32 czars
Nine are subject to Senate confirmation
And 15 of their positions existed
In a previous administration.
16 have already testified before Congress,
And so I must confess
I don’t understand
What it is Republicans demand.
92 years ago today Bolsheviks stormed the Winter Palace,
A day about which all we Liberal Commies like to reminisce.
But it wasn’t the Czars they deposed
When the Bolsheviks Communist rule imposed.
No, the Czars had been overthrown eight months before
And weren’t in power any more.
The Bolsheviks overthrew the Russian Provisional Government, you see,
Which had been Russia’s first step towards democracy.
Similarly, Republicans and Teabaggers complain about Obama’s czars
As if the Russian ones weren’t even nearly as bad as ours.
But what they’re really trying to create
Is revolution against the democratically elected government of November 2008.
Like the Bolsheviks, the GOP and Teabaggers don’t like how things turned out
And blame not being conservative enough for the GOP’s ignominious route.
But if you don’t like how things turned out eight (or in this case nine) months before,
Then like the Bolsheviks, just start a Civil War!
The Bolsheviks (like the GOP and Teabaggers) were in the minority,
And decided it was in their interest to dispense with democracy.
Many of GOP and Teabagger tactics seem to have the same goal.
But what the heck, it’s worth it to get back in control.
The Bolsheviks also specialized in personal attacks
And made extensive use of manufactured facts.
They manipulated the common people for their own ends,
With internal purges to maintain purity and eliminate erstwhile friends.
Sound familiar? It does to me too.
It reminds me of our own revolutionary movement and their attempted far right-wing coup.
Who would have guessed Bolsheviks and Republicans had so much in common?
It’s as if the GOP handbook had been written by Lenin!
No, the real Czarist government is not Obama’s,
Which is nowhere near as autocratic as the prior one was.
The real Czarist government was George Bush II
(After all, Bush had 46 “czars” compared to Obama’s 32).
And who are the Bolsheviks’ modern day heir apparent,
With deceitful tactics and methods transparent,
Who’ll do anything for power and scorn democracy?
You guessed it: Tea Party “Patriots” and the GOP.