Lou Dobbs? Not Tonight

November 12th, 2009

Inspired by “Anchor Lou Dobbs resigns from CNN” (Washington Post 11/12/09), “Lou Dobbs to resign from CNN after pressure by advocacy groups” (Daily Kos 11/12/09), and Lou Dobbs Quits CNN” (Huffington Post 11/11/09 updated 11/12/09). Watch the videos below.


You’re resigning from CNN?

Wait, what was that again?

Could it be that you were fired

Because of all the controversy in which you were mired?


Liberal groups (rightly) about your departure crow,

But I have mixed feelings, you know.

I’m not saying I’ll miss you when you go

(Nor I’m sure will the population Latino).


But what gives me pause about your new career twist

Is that you want to “go beyond the role of a television journalist.”

You want to “overcome the lack of true representation in Washington DC.”

I have to admit, that scares me.


You see, last November we had what’s called an election

Which (thankfully) took the country in a different direction.

But since then, you and your ilk have questioned the legitimacy

Of those duly installed by our Democracy.


I think I know what you mean by “true representation”–

It’s really a thinly-veiled denunciation.

Representation is only “true”

If the representative agrees with you.


You say “strong winds have buffeted this country.”

On that point I actually have to agree.

But the winds that I’m referring to

Are the winds of hot air that you and your kind blew.


On immigration, your views are abhorrent,

As you rail against the supposed illegal torrent.

You tar all immigrants with the same dark brush

As you and your followers to judgment rush.


You complained on air that you and your wife had been shot at,

Suggesting you were the target of an “ethnocentric interest group” assassination attempt.

The truth is it was probably a hunter’s stray bullet

(Too bad you view gun control with such contempt).


And as far as your vaunted birther investigation is concerned,

You showed yourself undauntedly by facts unconcerned.

It took a memo from your boss saying the story was “dead”

To get the point through your thick head.


You lament debate is now defined by “partisanship and ideology”

(Funny, since you are one cause of that pathology).

Maybe you can go work for Fox News.

At least they’ll be supportive of your crazy far-right views.


So good-bye, Lou.

Let’s hope that this time it’s for good, too.


Here’s Lou’s farewell statement.

Here’s the Media Matters piece on Lou Dobbs, including snippets of his “discussion” of illegal immigration and Obama’s foreign birth.

Here’s Lou Dobbs talking about the “ethnocentric interest group” shot fired at his house.

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