Leader of CPAC (or: Bridesmaid Revisited?)

February 15th, 2011

Inspired by Donald Trump announces potential run for president; disses Ron Paul (Examiner 2/11/11) and Ron Paul wins CPAC straw poll again (WashingtonPost.com 2/12/11).


“By the way, Ron Paul can not get elected, I’m sorry to tell you. And you know what else: I like Ron Paul. I think he’s a good guy. But honestly he has just zero chance of getting elected. You have to win an election.” – The Donald at CPAC


Some folks are always putting him down

(They say he’s just a crazy old clown).

A lot of people at CPAC have fallen for him,

So I guess one can’t completely ignore him.


But it’s one thing to lead the conservative pack,

And another the party nomination to crack.

Ron’s now twice in a row won the CPAC straw poll,

But can he in presidential politics play a serious role?


Ron ran as a Libertarian in 1988,

Then again as a Republican in 2008.

The GOP ended up going with someone new

And told Ron his candidacy was through.


Poor Ron’s always a bridesmaid,  and never a bride.

Will he ever be taken along for the ride?

Maybe this year will be different,

Since the only GOP candidate with a chance is indifferent.


If the GOP thinks Obama’s gonna win anyway,

They might just to their extreme base play

By nominating someone like SWMNBN or Ron Paul,

Even though the chance they’d get elected is very small.


So 2012 might actually be Ron Paul’s year

The GOP nomination to commandeer.

I for one am all for the GOP choosing

Someone with such a strong tradition of

Losing.

***

Here’s your theme music, Leader of the Pack by the Shangri-Las. (Also check out our modified song lyrics below.)

 

Here’s Hardball’s 2/14/11 panel discussion about CPAC.

 

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

Here’s Jon Stewart’s 2/15/11 report on CPAC.

 

– C-SNAP


Leader of the Pack

Leader of CPAC

[Spoken:]

[Spoken:]

Is she really going out with him?

Are they really gonna vote for him?

Well, there she is. Let’s ask her.

Well, here’s the straw poll. Let’s ask ‘em.

Betty, is that Jimmy’s ring you’re wearing?

CPAC, is that Ron Paul’s sign you’re carrying?

Mm-hmm

Mm-hmm

Gee, it must be great riding with him

Gee, it must be great supporting him

Is he picking you up after school today?

Do you think he’ll get nominated?

Uh-uh

Uh-uh

By the way, where’d you meet him?

By the way, where’d you meet him?



I met him at the candy store

I met him when he ran in ‘88

He turned around and smiled at me

I thought his anti-government views were great

You get the picture? (yes, we see)

You get the picture? (yes, we see)

That’s when I fell for (the leader of the pack)

That’s when I fell for (the leader of CPAC)



My folks were always putting him down (down, down)

Some folks are always putting him down (down, down)

They said he came from the wrong side of town

They say he’s just a crazy old clown.

(whatcha mean when ya say that he came from the wrong side of town?)

(whatcha mean when ya say that he’s a crazy old clown?)

They told me he was bad

They told me he was bad

But I knew he was sad

But I knew he was mad

That’s why I fell for (the leader of the pack)

That’s why I fell for (the leader of CPAC)



One day my dad said, “Find someone new”

In 2008 they said, “Find someone new”

I had to tell my Jimmy we’re through

I had to tell my Ron we were through

(whatcha mean when ya say that ya better go find somebody new?)

(whatcha mean when ya say that ya had t’ find somebody new?)

He stood there and asked me why

He stood there and asked me why

But all I could do was cry

But all I could do was cry

I’m sorry I hurt you (the leader of the pack)

I’m sorry I hurt you (the leader of CPAC)



[Spoken:]

[Spoken:]

He sort of smiled and kissed me goodbye

He sort of smiled and then waved goodbye

The tears were beginning to show

The tears were beginning to show

As he drove away on that rainy night

As he was driven away on that rainy night

I begged him to go slow

I begged him to run again

But whether he heard, I’ll never know

And have some anti-government fun again.

Look out! Look out! Look out! Look out!

Look out! Look out! Look out! Look out!



I felt so helpless, what could I do?

I feel so helpless, what can I do?

Remembering all the things we’d been through

Obama caused all the bad things we’ve been through

In school they all stop and stare

Trump says Ron’s chances are zero

I can’t hide the tears, but I don’t care

But I don’t care ‘cause he’s my hero.

I’ll never forget him (the leader of the pack)

I’ll always support him (the leader of CPAC)



The leader of the pack – now he’s gone

The leader of CPAC – now he’s back

The leader of the pack – now he’s gone

The leader of CPAC – now he’s back

The leader of the pack – now he’s gone

The leader of CPAC – now he’s back

The leader of the pack – now he’s gone

The leader of CPAC – now he’s back

[Fade]

[Fade]


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