Isn’t It Ironic? (or: JD, You’re Really An Idiot)

June 21st, 2010

A follow-up to our earlier pieces about Mr. Hayworth. Is anyone noticing a trend here?

“Taxes are the price we pay for civilization.” —  legendary Supreme Court Justice (and Republican) Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

My dear Mr. Hayworth,

For what it may be worth,

Though doing so puts me in a rut,

I still have to say: JD, you’re an idiot.

You say you’re against government waste,

But you’re paid spokesman for this program to give “Main Street” a taste?

For $1200, they “help” people get free government money.

If the program weren’t fraudulent, it would be funny.

It’s another scheme to dupe those who want to get rich quick

The brazenness of which makes me sick.

But the folks making money aren’t the suckers who buy,

They’re you and the company that this fake program supply.

You criticize people who suck on the government teat,

But tell folks to get “free government money” and “spend it on Main Street.”

You say “it’s your money,” and you deserve it.

Whatever happened to trying to conserve it?

Does that mean that everyone who pays any tax

Should do whatever they can to get all they can back?

Since “it’s your money,” I guess it’s OK to lie and cheat

Since you’re only taking back what the government took by deceit.

Is this your strategy to cut spending,

To treat the public purse like a source of funds never-ending?

Get as much as you can, and give as little as possible back?

And you dare, government spending and taxes to attack?

Some say your paid shilling for National Grants Conferences is hypocritical,

But I think they’re being overly critical.

Your position is actually completely consistent

With the philosophy on which Republicans have been insistent:

Condemn government while using it to enrich yourself and your friends

While cutting the taxes on which the government depends.

Make things so bad that the Ship of State runs aground,

Then propose policies that the disaster would compound.

Next, relentlessly attack and impair

The new captain’s attempts to repair

The leaks that you caused when you were giving the orders,

And didn’t pay attention to deficit disorders.

We pay taxes, but we often forget

The roads, schools, police, and social safety net,

And other things we ask the “gummint” to provide.

But I guess you and your crowd just want a free ride.


Here’s Rachel’s 6/21/10 report.

Visit for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

Here’s the inspiration for our title (a repeat performance from our earlier post) from the excellent series Scrubs. Yes, JD, you are (really) an idiot.

Here’s your theme music for today, Ironic (selected both for it’s overall theme and the “free ride” reference), from the album Jagged Little Pill by Alanis Morissette.

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One Response to “Isn’t It Ironic? (or: JD, You’re Really An Idiot)”

  1. Newsericks » Blog Archive » Run Rabbit Run (or, Captain Kirk Makes His Escape) Says:

    […] Here’s Hardball’s 6/16/10 report on Captain Kirk and fellow runner Sharron Angle (plus a bonus comment on J.D. Hayworth’s government money hucksterism). […]

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