Insert Government With a Gentle Sliding Motion (…Not So Gentle is Fine Too)

February 20th, 2012

A follow-up to Just Whores Anyway, inspired by CNN Contributor Dana Loesch Defends Virginia ‘State-Sponsored Rape’ Bill As No Different Than Consensual Sex (ThinkProgress 2/19/12 10:58)  and Loesch’s subsequent comparison of the forced vaginal ultrasound to a tampon.


“Someone please tell Playtex and Tampax to STOP THE RAPE.” — Dana Loesch


“Hold government lightly on the outer insertion tube at the grip location with your thumb and middle finger. Insert the outer tube into your vaginal opening at a slight upward angle, toward the small of your back. Gently slide the applicator all the way into your vagina, until your fingers touch your body. If government feels uncomfortable, it is probably not placed far enough into your vagina. The uncomfortable feeling comes from government rubbing against the muscles at the opening of the vagina. If this happens, simply remove government and try reinserting it, making sure to insert it deeper into your body.” – Tampax government insertion instructions


VA Republicans want

To make government so small

That when we force it inside you,

You’ll hardly notice at all.


Of course if you do,

That’s just tough–

It’s just not inserted

Deeply enough.


Don’t worry—VA is happy to help you

Insert it more deeply inside.

After all, government only hurts

When incorrectly applied.


And stop your complaining—

Just pretend it doesn’t hurt.

It’s for your own good that your betters

This power assert.


After all, you’re just women

And need to be protected.

And we’ll keep on doing that

As long as we’re reelected.


PS to Ms. Loesch: What makes rape different from consensual sex is the same thing that makes a forced vaginal probe different from insertion of a tampon. It’s the consent, or lack thereof.


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One Response to “Insert Government With a Gentle Sliding Motion (…Not So Gentle is Fine Too)”

  1. Araselia Says:

    Oh, he is on the Economics faculty at George Mason on bteetr authority than WIkipedia. In fact, it was just a couple of days ago that I was starting through a recent edition of Science (3 Feb) and had an odd experience. There was a book review of Strings Attached, a book about incentives and their flaws. It quickly turned out to be argumentative and breezy in tone in a way you don’t usually get in that mag, more like a blog entry (sorry) in a mediocre blog (that’s ok, then) than a review in a journal.Who wrote this, anyway? I ask. Look at the credit and see a name that maybe is vaguely familiar; look at the footnote and see “Department of Economics, George Mason University”, an affiliation that explains a lot. And then I realize where I’ve seen the name, in Brad DeLong’s blog, where he’s a favorite source for bad economics.Tyler Cowen, right. So he truly is an economist, because Science is careful with attributions.And his stuff, even when he’s trying to write seriously and not just tweeting snarkily, can be a bit embarrassing.

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