Fincher’s Clincher (or, The Jumping Frogs of Crockett County)

April 3rd, 2010

Inspired by Tea parties may face choice in election: Ideals or pragmatism (Washington Post 4/02/10).

“If Republicans are going to complain about subsidizing General Motors, that’s a drop in the bucket to farm subsidies. But they’re backing candidates who are taking large amounts of money from the federal government. That’s hypocritical.” — Mid-South Tea Party leader Jim Tomasik


Down in Frog Jump Tennessee

(A little town in Crockett County),

Political newcomer Stephen Fincher

Seemed to be a Tea Party clincher.


The GOP leadership has appointed him

And as the GOP candidate anointed him.

But some Teabaggers aren’t sure

If they want to vote for this welfare entrepreneur.


Though he’s purportedly for small government

(Usually enough, Teabagger support to cement),

Fincher is the proud recipient of $200K per year in farm subsidies,

Which some in the Tea Party didn’t particularly please.


Between 1995 and 2006 he received $2.5 million

(Not bad for a government hating civilian).

How fitting that this government-sponsored millionaire

About basic services for the non-rich doesn’t care.


“No new taxes” and “cut spending” Fincher intones,

As he the unfairness of healthcare reform bemoans.

What he really means is no taxes or spending for others.

After all, he’s much more worthy than those poor single mothers.


If elected, I’m sure Fincher will support keeping those subsidies flowing,

While at the same time the “small government” line towing.

What’s the word for doing the same thing of which you’re hyper-critical?

Oh yeah—it’s called hypocritical.


In the meantime, conservative candidates are playing leap frog

To see who gets to roll the Tea Party log,

Each one trying to prove he’s the most conservatively pure

That all-important Teabagger endorsement to secure.


But the thing about log-rolling is that it’s hard to stay on top–

You have to keep your feet moving non-stop.

If you make the slightest blunder,

You’ll just get sucked under.

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One Response to “Fincher’s Clincher (or, The Jumping Frogs of Crockett County)”

  1. 2 in Crockett mayor race | Rebuilder Cars Says:

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