Don’t Tax Me, Bro!

April 10th, 2010

Tax Day is coming up, so I’m doing a series of posts about taxes and government.

“Don’t tax you, don’t tax me, tax that fellow behind the tree.” – Russel B. Long
“Taxes are the price we pay for civilization.” —  Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

“Don’t tax me” is the Teabagger mantra,

As soothing as a dose of Elantra.

Is being taxed really so bad?

Why do even low taxes make people so mad?

A lot of people see taxes as legalized theft

The purpose of which is their money to bereft.

That may be true in an autocracy

But we live in a democracy.

We decide together what the government should do,

And then pay taxes to allow it to.

Of course, that’s the way it’s supposed to function,

But the system has started to malfunction.

Republicans say they want to cut spending, but never do.

They do cut taxes (just not for me and you).

Regan introduced the idea that you don’t have to pay

And you can still get everything you want anyway.

GB2 perfected the technique of both having and eating your cake

Using deficits to finance wars, giveaways, and a wealthy tax break.

Those policies left us in the mess we’re now in.

We have to fix it, but it’s hard to know where to begin.

There’s no way we can balance the budget if taxes are off the table,

And anyone who says otherwise is clearly unstable.

So can we please stop this anti-tax craze?

After all, taxes aren’t as bad as being tazed.


Here’s the famous video clip from which this post takes its name (and your theme music for today), mixed with Can’t Touch This by MC Hammer, somebody else who has problems with the tax system ((click here to keep that from happening to you)), which is why he had to sell all his gold and do the Cash4Gold (watch that below).



Here’s Hammer’s Nationwide Insurance commercial, which I always thought was pretty funny.

File Your Taxes]

Cash4Gold, Everybody's doing it!

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