Condemning Jesus

April 20th, 2012

Inspired by Nuns group ‘stunned’ by Vatican slap (Washington Post 4/20/12, A2) about the Vatican’s condemnation of American nuns for spending too much time ministering to the sick and poor instead of focusing on more important issues, like being virulently anti-abortion, anti-Pill, and anti-gay. You know, like Jesus was…


“A prominent U.S. Catholic nuns group said Thursday that it was ‘stunned’ that the Vatican reprimanded it for spending too much time on poverty and social-justice concerns and not enough on condemning abortion and gay marriage. In a stinging report on Wednesday, the Vatican said the Leadership Conference of Women Religious had been ‘silent on the right to life’ and had failed to make the ‘Biblical view of family life and human sexuality’ a central plank in its agenda.” – the Washington Post, citing the Wednesday’s stinging Vatican indictment of U.S. nuns


“In a follow-up to yesterday’s condemnation of American nuns, the Vatican also condemned Jesus for spending too much time ministering to the sick and poor, and not enough time on condemning abortion, birth control, and gay marriage. Jesus, in a troubling and unacceptable departure from Church doctrine, is not known to have mentioned any of those issues even once during his ministry.” – Tomorrow’s Post?


It turns out that ministering to the sick and the poor

Doesn’t make you a good Catholic anymore.


Helping the needy, it turns out, a less important role plays

Than issuing statements demonizing abortion, birth control, and gays.


It’s more important to appear regularly on TV

Saying how evil those things are and always will be.


So American nuns, though you might be surprised,

Consider yourself duly chastised.


You must follow the example set by the Bishops, not by our Lord,

In order to be guaranteed your heavenly reward.


So stop spending so much time on good deeds,

Which to all kinds of doctrinal errors leads.


Instead, do like the Bishops and focus on angry denunciation,

Even if that requires your personal belief’s renunciation.


Like the saying goes, it’s better to curse the darkness than light a candle.

After all, “rejection of faith is also a serious source of scandal.”


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One Response to “Condemning Jesus”

  1. Newsericks » Blog Archive » Sexual Sinners Says:

    […] (He was less like a modern-day bishop, and more like a nun.) […]

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