Albatresbians (or, What’s That Around Your Neck?)

April 14th, 2010

A follow-up to our earlier post Adam and Steve, inspired by Can Animals Be Gay? (Jon Mooallem, New York Times Magazine 3/29/10) and  The Love That Dare Not Squawk its Name (NewYorkTimes.com)

Ah ! well a-day ! what evil looks
Had I from old and young !
Instead of the cross, the Albatross
About my neck was hung.
Samuel Taylor Coleridge,
  The Rime of the Ancient Mariner
As I’ve discussed before, straight men don’t seem to be as bothered by gay chicks.


Laura Bush once praised Laysan albatross couples

Without realizing that one-third of girl birds with another chick couples.

Would Laura instead have called them an abomination

If she’d read Lindsay Young’s dissertation?


Why does it matter anyway

If animals can or can’t be naturally gay?

Because if they are, then the same’s probably true for humans

(Yet another argument that science over ideology wins).


This idea particularly upsets the Religious Right

Who think homosexuality just isn’t right.

It’s not natural, they vehemently say,

And anyway, no one’s born gay.


But if homosexuality is common in God’s creation,

Then it isn’t (as they falsely portray) an aberration.

That makes is no more evil for girls to like girls or guys guys

Than to be born with blonde hair and blue eyes.


Speaking of albatrosses, Mr. Glenn Beck:

You (and other anti-gay rightists) should be wearing one around your neck.

And remember, you gun owners who to gays are adverse:

Killing an albatross results in a horrible curse.

***

Here’s Stephen Colbert’s 4/13/10 interview with author Jon Mooallem. Props, Mr. Colbert, for the title, and to you, Mr. Samuel Taylor Coleridge for your inspiration of the subtitle.

The Colbert Report Mon – Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Jon Mooallem
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor Fox News

For more about gay animals, being born gay, and gay adoption, read our posts Gay Pets, Crazy Like a PFOX, and Suffer Little Children. And don’t forget to take the Gay Pets Survey.

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One Response to “Albatresbians (or, What’s That Around Your Neck?)”

  1. Tweets that mention Newsericks » Blog Archive » Albatresbians (or, What’s That Around Your Neck?) -- Topsy.com Says:

    […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Newsericks. Newsericks said: Can animals be gay? Yes, they can, espcially albatrosses. http://newsericks.com/albatresbians #gayrights #animalrights #coleridge #glennbeck […]

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